Support when facing or grieving the loss of a pet
Losing a much-loved pet can be devastating. So can knowing that a goodbye may be approaching.
Your pet may be part of your routines, your family and your sense of home. When they die, the space they leave can feel enormous.
Whatever you are feeling, and however long you have been feeling it, you are not being silly, overreacting or grieving ‘too much’.
Help is available, and you do not have to carry this alone.
Do you urgently need someone to talk to?
Samaritans is available free of charge at any time of the day or night. You can talk about whatever you are going through, without judgement.
If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 999 or go to A&E.
Pet grief is real
There is no correct way to grieve and no timetable you are expected to follow.
You may feel sadness, numbness, anger, guilt, relief, gratitude or doubt, sometimes several of these at once. You may find it difficult to sleep, concentrate, work or return to familiar routines.
These feelings do not mean that you are weak, that you made the wrong decision or that your pet’s death should have affected you less.
You are far from alone
- 53%
of pet parents surveyed by Vets at Home said they experienced guilt after their pet died.
- 47%
of those who felt confident that the timing of euthanasia was right still experienced guilt.
This is important: guilt can be part of carrying the responsibility for a deeply painful decision. Its presence does not, by itself, mean that your decision was wrong.
- 92%
said their loss affected their ability to work or manage daily life.
- 46%
said the loss was still affecting them when they completed the Vets at Home survey.
- 75.4%
RSPCA research found that 75.4% experienced anticipatory grief while thinking about their pet’s death, and 66.9% were surprised by how intense their grief felt.
Your grief reflects the place your pet held in your life. It deserves to be taken seriously.
Sources: The Final Goodbye survey for Vets at Home, 2026, 2,452 responses, including 2,410 people who had experienced pet loss. Percentages are based on those who answered each relevant question, so individual bases vary. RSPCA Pet Grief Surveys, conducted over two years with more than 4,000 respondents.
If you are facing a goodbye
Grief can begin before your pet dies. You may already be grieving changes in their health, personality or quality of life while also trying to make difficult decisions about their care.
This is called anticipatory grief. It is real, and it can bring sadness, fear, guilt and uncertainty.
You do not have to wait until after your pet has died to ask for support. Speak to your veterinary team about any changes you have noticed and the questions or worries you are carrying.
The following resources may also help.
RSPCA: Facing the end
The RSPCA’s pet bereavement toolkit includes guidance about recognising when the end may be approaching, making kind decisions and understanding what to expect.
The Vets at Home Good Life Plan
The Good Life Plan can help you think about and record the things that make life enjoyable for your pet. Noticing changes over time can make conversations with your vet clearer and help you feel less alone in the decisions ahead.
Talk to someone who understands pet loss
Blue Cross Pet Loss Support
Blue Cross provides free and confidential emotional support for anyone who is facing or grieving the loss of a pet.
Its trained volunteers can support you by telephone, email or webchat. This is a listening and emotional-support service rather than counselling.
Telephone: 0800 096 6606
Open: 8.30am to 8.30pm every day
Cats Protection: Paws to Listen
If you are grieving for a cat, Cats Protection offers a free and confidential telephone service staffed by trained volunteer listeners. A callback service and online support form are also available.
Telephone: 0800 024 94 94
Open: 9am to 5pm, Monday to Friday, excluding Bank Holidays
Connect with people who understand
Talking to people who have experienced pet loss can sometimes make grief feel less isolating.
Blue Cross Pet Loss Support Community
This is a private Facebook group for people who are facing or grieving pet loss. It is run by Blue Cross and moderated by its expert team.
Reading about other people’s experiences can be comforting, but it can also feel overwhelming, especially when your loss is very recent. It is always okay to step away and return when, or if, it feels right for you.
The Ralph Site
The Ralph Site is a not-for-profit pet-loss website created by a UK veterinary surgeon. It provides information about grief, euthanasia and aftercare, along with memorial options, a private forum and information about specialist bereavement support.
Find specialist pet-loss support
Love, Baxter
Love, Baxter is a pet loss and end-of-life resource with a directory of professionals and services, including pet bereavement counsellors, grief-support groups and veterinary social workers.
The platform is international, but you can search specifically for support available in the UK or online. Some of the services listed will charge a fee.
Counsellors and support providers can have different qualifications and levels of experience. Before arranging paid support, check the individual’s professional qualifications, registration, experience, fees and whether they are based in, or able to work with people in, the UK.
Association of Pet Bereavement Counsellors
The Association of Pet Bereavement Counsellors provides a specialist directory divided between accredited members, who have completed its assessment process, and registered members who have not undergone that additional assessment.
The Association does not recommend individual practitioners, so you should still check that a counsellor’s qualifications, professional registration and approach are appropriate for you.
Supporting a child after the loss of a pet
For a child, the death of a pet may be their first experience of bereavement.
Children may move in and out of their grief, ask the same questions repeatedly or express their feelings through behaviour rather than words.
Child Bereavement UK recommends using clear, age-appropriate language and avoiding expressions such as ‘gone to sleep’, which can be confusing or frightening for younger children.
Its guidance includes ways to explain what has happened, validate a child’s feelings and remember their pet together.
The RSPCA toolkit also includes dedicated guidance for parents and carers.
Books that may help children
Reading together can give children words for feelings they may not yet know how to explain. These books have previously been recommended by Vets at Home. The suggested age ranges are only a guide, as every child understands and experiences grief differently.
For ages 3 to 7
When a Pet Dies by Fred Rogers
Gentle and honest. It addresses the feelings and questions children may have after a pet dies and helps adults talk openly with them about loss.
The Goodbye Book by Todd Parr
Colourful, warm and reassuring. Told through the eyes of a fish whose companion has died, it helps children recognise that grief can bring many different feelings and that support is available.
For ages 5 to 10
Goodbye Mog by Judith Kerr
A beautiful and gentle story about Mog’s death and the way her family begins to adjust. It approaches loss honestly and tenderly without being frightening.
I’ll Always Love You by Hans Wilhelm
A moving story about a boy and his dog, Elfie, as they grow up together. It celebrates their relationship and the importance of expressing love while gently introducing ageing, death and remembrance.
Amazon availability, editions and prices can change. These are ordinary Amazon UK search links, not affiliate links.
When grief continues to feel unmanageable
Grief does not follow a straight line. Difficult feelings can return unexpectedly, even months or years later.
Please consider speaking to your GP if your grief is making everyday life feel unmanageable, is becoming harder rather than easier to live alongside, or is significantly affecting your sleep, work, relationships or ability to care for yourself.
You can also use the Love, Baxter or Association of Pet Bereavement Counsellors directories to explore specialist support.
You do not have to minimise what you have lost
They were not ‘just a pet’.
They were part of your life, your routines, your memories and your family. Missing them is a natural response to loving them.
Be gentle with yourself. Take things a day, or an hour, at a time, and reach for support whenever you need it.
This page provides general information and signposting. It is not a substitute for medical or mental-health advice, diagnosis or treatment. Vets at Home does not control the external organisations or services listed.
Last reviewed: 3 September 2026.